personal photography goals

In my “I’m not making resolutions” post, I mentioned “growing as a photographer” as one of my goals for 2013.

And my sweet and talented photographer friend Gretchen sent me this Facebook message …

Hi Keli! Read your blog today about your goals for 2013. I was shocked to read “grow as a photographer”. Not that we don’t all have room to grow, but I’m really interested about how you want to grow. I feel like you are already so talented and creative and accomplished. I would love to hear more about your photography goals.

[posted with her permission]

I have to be honest, I kind of snorted and said, “oh my word, girl, you have no idea” when I read it, because OH MY WORD, GIRL, YOU HAVE NO IDEA. I am so SO not where I want to be in my photography, and I still have so much to learn and so much to work on.

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My number one photography goal in 2013 is to learn to work WITH light. I want to learn to see it and use it. We have amazing light in our house thanks to a lot of really big windows [and no window coverings, ha!] but I’d like to focus more on shadows and focused light.

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I also really want to get back into capturing our everyday. I take loads of pictures with my phone, which is okay, but I need to get my “real” camera out and use it more often. I just really want to get back to the basics of photographing the moments in our house.

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Editing is always something I need to work on – mostly getting images good enough SOOC to not need a lot of editing.

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I also want to get outside more. I’m a super duper homebody, ESPECIALLY when it’s cold, and with all of the house selling business going on, I have literally been stuck inside, cleaning for about 4 months straight. But soon, we won’t have to worry about that, so I want to get back into a daily routine of playing outside and going for walks and taking my camera along for the ride.

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Along those same lines, I NEED to get all three of my kids in one picture together. A good picture. A picture that I can print and hang and enjoy.

So … just a few things to keep me busy in 2013.

so much to say, nothing to say

I have so much to talk about that it’s easier to just say nothing. I don’t know what’s going on with me, but I just find myself boring myself.

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I guess what I’m trying to say that is that we’re in the middle of so many things, I would almost rather wait until it’s all said and done.

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House selling things.

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Speech therapy things.

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ALL THE THINGS.

Do you ever wonder if your brain might actually explode from the things going through it?

Me too.

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two thousand and thirteen

Do you make new year’s resolutions?

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I know myself well enough to know that I won’t follow through on an actual “list of resolutions,” but I have a mental clump of “areas I want to improve upon” in the year 2013. One of these areas would be those mental clumps that never materialize into anything other than a mental clump.

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I also have goals – physical, financial, photographic, mental – but nothing set in stone like “run 2013 miles in 2013.” [that's like 6 miles a day, so hahahaHAHAHA. no.]

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Whatever you are doing, whether it is making a list of resolutions or having goals or ignoring the fact that we started a new year, I wish you all the best in 2013.

I kind of wish I could stop blogging

I just wrote a big long post about what all has been happening around here, but it ended up sounding like a huge whiny whine, even though I wasn’t whining. So I erased it all. Starting over. Counting my blessings.

But then the whole “counting my blessings because I’m so blessed” is kind of like … “LIFE IS ALL RAINBOWS! AND MY HOUSE IS NEVER MESSY! AND I NEVER SKIP SHOWERS! AND THERE IS NO MOLDY FOOD IN MY FRIDGE!!”

Well. I am currently sitting on the sofa with cold coffee on the table beside me, cracker crumbs on the floor under my feet and Lucy grunting in the playroom. And we all know what grunting means.

So now it’s been 4 hours since I typed that last sentence … I’ve made lunch, vacuumed downstairs, folded a load of laundry, nursed Henry 3 times, changed 6 diapers and went to pick up Emma from school. Now, Lucy and Henry are both napping, and Emma is playing outside.

No two days are ever the same and yet they are all exactly the same.

How does that happen? I’ve read similar posts on other blogs, but it’s so true. It’s like even though the details change, it is basically the same story every day.

I’m not saying it’s a bad story. Or a sad story. Or that I’m bored or whining about it. It’s just … talking about it is so repetitive.

Anyway, I’m sitting here thinking that I should just delete all of my words and post something else, but I am at a total loss of what to post.

I think having access to a phone where I can text with friends and post quick snippets on social sites has made it almost impossible for me to blog full, coherent thoughts. And I’m actually okay with that right now. So bear with me while I navigate through a few more months of this crazy life. I’d love to say that once we sell this house and get into our new house, things will pick back up. But sadly, that’s probably not true.

But let’s just pretend it is … for a little while longer.

attitude adjustment

I complain. Shocking, I know.

Close friends get texts. Ken hears it when he gets home. My mom hears it over the phone. I think it’s normal to complain about things in our lives. It’s healthy to vent!!

But I am trying to give myself an attitude adjustment. Instead of complaining about every little thing, I decided to try to embrace my life and all of the good things in it.

For one thing, I am a stay at home mom. I get to stay at home with my kids. I get to see Emma get off the bus. I get to nurse Henry as much as I want to and put him down for naps. I get to eat lunch with Lucy every single day. I get to basically CHOOSE our schedule any given day.

Not that I think there is anything wrong with working moms, but I always wanted to be a stay at home mom, and I have been given that opportunity! This IS my dream job. <== That right there is reason enough to just SHUT UP complaining about every little thing that happens in my day.

Henry’s not napping? I have the opportunity to pop him in the baby carrier and walk with him and Lucy until he falls asleep.

I can’t eat milkshakes and mayonnaise and pizza because of Henry? At least there are pretty amazing substitutes out there now that I can easily get my hands on.

Lucy gets into everything and makes huge messes? I’m around to see it! I’m here at home with her 24/7, and I don’t have to miss a second of her life.

Emma won’t quit talking? She WANTS to be around me enough to share every detail of her day with me instead of shutting me out.

Keeping the house clean to show to potential buyers is a huge pain? We aren’t foreclosing, we aren’t upside down in our mortgage, we are blessed to be able to purchase a nicer home simply because we need more rooms and bathrooms.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not bragging. I’m not saying that my life is BETTER because of any of these things.

But I have an amazing life, and I am very grateful for all of these things. My husband works so hard to provide for us, and I’m extremely fortunate to be able to do what I want to do.

On top of all of that, I’m also healthy. And my husband and kids are healthy. Every day, I hear about someone else being hospitalized or on bed rest with a difficult pregnancy or dealing with cancer or Alzheimer’s or a myriad of other completely UNFAIR diseases. So waking up and being healthy already puts me ahead of the game.

There’s nothing wrong with venting about things in your life and wishing things would go smoother. We all have issues and problems that we deal with. But I just wanted to challenge myself to find the positive.

I already feel so much better!